Oh, Blanton’s Bourbon—because nothing says “exclusive” like a bottle that’s somehow rarer than a unicorn on a Peloton.
It’s known (read: worshipped) for its “complex and inviting” flavor profile, which basically means it smells like caramel, vanilla, and citrus—or, you know, like every bakery-scented candle ever. Groundbreaking.
On the palate, you’ll be treated to the usual suspects: sweet honey (surprise!), spicy rye (how original), and dried fruits, because apparently someone thought trail mix belonged in a whiskey.
And then there’s the finish—a “medium length” parade of cinnamon, mace (how fancy), and if you’re lucky, a nice little “farmy” or “hay” note. Yes, hay. As in: the thing horses eat. But sure, let’s call that rustic.
In short: it’s a decent pour wrapped in a collector cult. But hey—if you like your whiskey with a side of status anxiety and horse-themed bottle tops, Blanton’s is your jam.